Taking Care of the Birdy Business

I have three birds.  I am convinced that there is no pet that you can own that is messier than a bird.  Well I guess maybe a monkey throwing poop before he rips your head off might be messier…but those are isolated incidents.  Birds are consistently messy.  Even after you’ve cleaned the cages they still look dirty.  But don’t get me wrong, I love my birds.  Murphy is the oldest.  He is a Bronze Wing Pionus and a feather plucker.  He’s got a little touch of OCD.  We’ve tried collars and Prozac, but for him we think it is best to let him enjoy his nudist lifestyle.  He loves to make his cage even messier by soaking all of his food.  What he doesn’t eat, he throws around his cage. He came to us knowing one word…asshole.  Every time he meets someone new, he likes to get close to them and menacingly whisper “asshole.”  I think he is adorable.  Then we have Melvin.  He is a Dusky Pionus.  His favorite things to do are screaming early in the morning and whistling the Andy Griffith theme…over and over again.  The back of his head is bald where Murphy has over groomed him the way he likes.  Then there is Erlenmeyer (yes like the flask).  He is a parakeet.  He used to live in my office, but unfortunately he got laid off with me.  He is currently molting which adds the aspect of tiny down feathers floating all around our house. 

They have their own room which we also use as an office.  Sometimes they take off and fly…well Melvin and Erlenmeyer do anyway, Murphy just falls like a stone.  When they take off it causes a chain reaction of pandemonium.  There is a lot of human screaming, feather flapping (except for Murphy, of course) and frantic dog movement with an emphasis on toenails trying to grasp the wood floor.  We’ve gotten pretty good and handling these situations and also have noticed that the birds appear to do it for fun.  An amusing thing is the dogs NEVER bother Murphy when this happens.  They have no idea what to make of his lack of feathers.  All four stop immediately in their tracks with a look of fear and disgust akin to shaking a cross made of garlic at an immortal.  Perhaps Murphy is so intelligent that he has actually created the ultimate defense mechanism.  He is adorable and smart.  Murphy and Melvin LOVE french fries and showers with me.  Erlenmeyer LOVES throwing grit everywhere in a frenzy and Queen’s Another One Bites the Dust.  He stops whatever he is doing, jumps on his swing and swings and chirps loudly to the beat.  He is very serious about that song. 

Birds are messy, entertaining and well worth the effort.