Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Angelina Jolie's Leg and the Costa Concordia – “True” History Tuesday

The “True” History Tuesday executive research team has uncovered evidence suggesting that Angelina Jolie’s right leg was involved in the tumping over of the Costa Concordia cruise ship.  Obviously, the entire capsizing was a complete accident, but evidence suggests that the slight hip movement and jetting out of said leg in a dramatic stance caused a hacky-sack-like kick to the ship’s hull.  The accident occurred during fittings of the Versace dress that Jolie ultimately wore to the 84th Annual Academy Awards.  Evidence also suggests that the kick would have had nothing to do with the capsizing and had more of a heavy-winds-type of effect on the ship, if it weren’t for the moronic actions of the ship’s captain, Francesco Schettino.  The moronic actions include traveling too fast in shallow waters, being too close to the rocky shoreline and being distracted on the bridge by a 25-year-old Moldovan dancer.

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