Monday, September 19, 2011

Toe-Sucker and A SpongeBob Smackdown

I always like to keep current on the news of the weird.  It just helps with day to day conversation.  Today the news of the weird included a story about a potential serial toe-sucker wreaking havoc in Conway, Arkansas.  My favorite part of this story is the toe-sucking assailant going up to a woman in a department store and telling her that her toes were “long and succulent.”  The guy leaves when the woman’s cell phone goes off, but then finds her again.  Ultimately, she reports him to the police and describes him as wearing flip flops, a t-shirt and blue jeans. She then felt compelled to add that he had, “messed up toes.”  Turns out, this is not the first time a toe-sucker has sucked his way through Conway.  In the 1990s, a man police called the “Toe-Suck Fairy” plagued the town and surely single-mouthedly halted the sale of open-toed shoes.  You just can’t make this shit up.  It should be noted that I have been to Conway, Arkansas.  It is the home of Pickles Gap Village.  Conway has provided me with lots of funny photo opportunities.  Including this picture I took of David’s giant cock.  

Thank you Conway for your weird news and great photo ops!

In other news of the weird, apparently an over-zealous SpongeBob got his sponge ass kicked.  Costumes like this creep me out.  I dislike it immensely when they come at you smiling and waving.  I don’t want a hug from them, I don’t want them to touch me…I want them to keep shuffling on their merry way.  I have imagined myself doing this countless times…just because the visual is appealing and funny.  So finding this made me laugh.

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