Thursday, October 13, 2011

Dogs in Glass Houses Shouldn't Eat Glass

Yesterday morning started out with a bang, well, more of a crash, really.  I made the mistake of leaving a glass on the coffee table.  I had made myself a sweet-tea vodka cocktail the night before while I watched Parenthood (pretty good show, BTW).  Then I headed to bed to read and completely forgot to put the glass in the dishwasher.  The dogs and I got up the next morning and Harpo was jack-rabbit jumping from couch to loveseat trying to play with the other dogs.  He’s such an idiot, but he is an agile idiot…which really compounds his ability to cause damage.  As I was putting on my shoes to walk them, Harpo continued to jump and fly around like a moron.  Not surprisingly, his foot hit the glass I left on the table.  It crashed to the floor and broke.  Glass was everywhere with all the dogs, including Harpo, looking at me like I had thrown a glass at them.  I had to keep the dogs from the glass and get the broom – which is not easy when you are still half-asleep.  I thought I got everything swept up and off we went on our walk.  As we walked, I imagined myself spraying the back of Harpo’s head with a water gun.  This gave me joy.

I took this picture because it is so rare for Harpo to actually sit still.  Notice how he wears a harness.  He is such a moron when we walk that his body must be encased in this apparatus.

Later that morning, Celie bounded up on the couch.  She seemed very proud and began to loudly crunch and chew something.  I asked Tiffany, “What does she have?”  Tiffany looked and Celie continued to crunch.  As Tiffany got closer, Celie’s expression changed and she growled.  She was defending whatever she had found.  Tiffany asked her, “What do you have?”  She does this, yet history has proven they won’t ever actually answer her questions.  Tiffany’s hand swooped in and pulled out…a big piece of glass.  Celie was not only eating, but defending the right to eat a piece of freaking glass.  Celie is the smallest of our dogs, but the alpha.  She constantly displays her toughness, but this was slightly ridiculous.  I suppose if she could she would eat fire and stick pins in her face, too.  

Guess which one is Celie?

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