Semen Sample and Phoenix Jones

Now this is just the type of story that makes me have an OCD episode.  Some jerk in a New Mexico Sunflower Market decided putting his semen in yogurt samples was a really good idea.  Since the woman he gave his “sample” to realized something was a little salty about her yogurt, the guy got caught and admitted he’d added an extra ingredient.  I’ve pretty much always been convinced that this sort of thing is not an isolated incident.  If I go to a restaurant or especially fast food restaurant and the meal is not what I ordered…I eat it anyway.  I just know there is always a chance if I send food back, the new food will return to me with spit, pee, poop, snot or semen as a topping.  I can’t help it, that is just the way my mind works.

In other weird news, apparently Seattle has a superhero.  His name is Phoenix Jones.  What this really means is there is some guy running around in a costume who thinks he is a superhero.  Phoenix Jones thought he saw a fight and went to break it up using pepper spray.  I think this particular article has two of the best quotes ever in the history of quotes:  “Nobody was dancing, it was not ambiguous, there was definitely fighting,” and “Just because he’s dressed up in a costume, it doesn’t mean he’s in special consideration or above the law.”