Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Gonzo and Oscar the Grouch – “True” History Tuesday

It was widely believe, based upon false information presented to us during the Muppets from Space film, that Gonzo the Great was actually an alien.  This was a complete cover up story designed to protect that illicit and long-running affair between the Muppet rocker Janice and Sesame Street’s Snuffleupagus.   Obviously, there was always intermingling between the Muppets and the Sesame Street characters, but this relationship took it to an entirely different level.  Even more shocking is that Gonzo the Great had a brother, Oscar the Grouch.  Not only did they both share a THE in their names and eerily similar ping pong ball eyes, but unbeknownst to them they also shared the same Y chromosome.

Janice met Snuffleupagus while on tour with Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem Band.  They had a benefit gig at Hooper’s Store.  Janice spotted Snuffleupagus and fell madly in love when she heard him say, “Hey Bird.”  They knew their love was forbidden and must be hidden from all the muppet puppets.  When Oscar was born they panicked and threw him in a trash can.  Amazingly, he survived and actually thrived in this environment…although his temperament was grouchy, at best.  Their reckless affair continued and yielded another baby two years later.  Again, they were consumed by panic.  They opted to launch him to space in a high powered circus canon.  Gonzo also flourished and thoroughly enjoyed being raised by his alien parents.  The Janice and Snuffleupagus affair finally ended when they discovered they just weren’t compatible.

Another Muppet scandal involved the affair between Wayne and Wanda.  This affair, of course, was not secret to anyone.  They were vomitously affectionate with each other.  What they hid from the world is they too had an illegitimate child, Pepe the King Prawn.  

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