Tuesday, March 1, 2011

The Charlie Sheen of Cleaning

Nothing makes me surer that I have Adonis DNA and tiger blood then dusting and cleaning bathrooms day at my own Sober Valley Lodge.  I’m honestly tired of pretending I’m not special…like I’m not the bitchin and total rock star from Mars of dust free shelves and table-tops.  When it comes to cleaning on Tuesdays, I have one speed – GO!  I wouldn’t have the cleaning any other way for my goddesses.  I'm Gnarly.  I'm Passionate. The amazing thing is the cleaning is at this level by the power of my mind.  Some people dust normally, but that isn’t for me.  If these fools and trolls who think they can clean saw my bathrooms they’d be apologizing and licking my feet.  Gibberish of fools.  My cleaning is the best, I’m a warlock.  Drug tests don’t lie.  Scoreboards don’t lie. Clean toilets don’t lie.  If everyone would just follow my plan, everyone would win.  I tackle dust and dirt one way and one way only – with violent hatred. DUH!  Don’t be worried, there’s nothing broken here.  I just deliver the goods at every freakin turn of my swiffer and toilet brush, bro.  My cleaning is battle tested with bayonets.  Winning!!

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